Take time to recalibrate: You will be glad you did
Cal·i·brate
(verb) to adjust precisely for a particular function (Meriam-Webster’s Dictionary)
As the school year approaches, I get a little stressed. I know the pressure I put on myself to be all things. I know what I am trying to accomplish in all areas of my life, and I know how stressed my son gets as the school year progresses.
I am preparing ways to deal with my stress and not take on the stress of those closest to me.
You see, not everything comes easy for my son. He struggles with math and numbers, and his frustration ramps to levels much higher than his summer chill mode. He takes his stress in stride and has persevered so many times; however, he burns out. His neurodivergent brain, he is on the spectrum and has ADHD, gets overloaded and overwhelmed. Top it off that he is nearing the age of 12, a critical brain growth time for children. (If you haven’t read “Brain Storm,” I highly recommend it. It is all about this stage in life.)
Oh, and did I mention this is my son’s first year in middle school?
Knowing all of this adds to my anticipation for the “opportunities” we might face this year. Usually, I would say challenges, but I am working on my language here because these challenges are growth opportunities.
This year will hit 0 to 60 fast enough to give me whiplash, and I have been asking myself this week. “Am I ready?”
The answer is simply NO. No, I am not ready and feel I am not the only one. Others might have a child starting kindergarten, middle, or high school. It could even be their child’s senior year. I imagine many of you would say the same. No. I. Am. Not. Ready.
But ready or not, here it comes. We can’t slow down time. We can’t stop it. However, we can adapt, Adjust. Recalibrate our habits for the changes about to happen. This week, I decided to focus on that adaptation. I am setting goals and anticipating hurdles. Honestly, as I typed those words, I sighed. Out loud. I felt my body relax.
Why? Knowing all of these opportunities that await, I am sure that a well-developed plan will help me sail through them a little easier, and my plan will leave room for diversions and mishaps. The emotions and the feelings of overwhelm during the school year often arise because I strive for perfection. This year, I am not going to worry about perfect. I am going to worry about being authentic. Genuine. Caring for myself and others.
So, my goal this week before the madness starts to ramp up is to pause. I am going to prepare for the year, and I am going to put a plan into place that will help me with the hurdles, or shall I say opportunities, that I may face. I will permit myself to say no when I need to say no and overstretch when I want to do so.
This looks like simplifying wherever I can. Declutter areas that I often use, such as my closet. Right now, I can’t even find clothes that I know are there, and I need to purge some of those less-worn clothes. I also need to plan, creating a schedule so that I don’t have to think twice about what I am writing that week or what I am creating. Those efforts will be on autopilot.
Most importantly, I need to remember to show myself empathy, something Shirzad Chamine, creator of Positive Intelligence, reminds his students often. So, when I don’t meet a goal, I will probably solve it and get curious about why, but I will also not berate myself. I will give myself grace. Then, if I need to do it again, I will recalibrate and change what isn’t helping me at that time.
So as you stare down an opportunity you are facing, how can you recalibrate and adjust to fit the changing circumstance, and how can you give yourself grace through the process? Essentially, the goal is to keep moving toward your goals, not burn yourself out or make yourself want to give up. Recalibrating could be the key to success you never knew you needed.
Are you looking to level up your efforts while avoiding burnout? If so, email me at michelle@theunrestedlife.com to learn more.
