Let yourself rest

     This past weekend, I camped with my son and his scout troop. We had beautiful weather, and it was hot. I sat in my chair under the shade of trees and realized. This moment was the first time in a long time I sat and did nothing. I wasn’t cleaning the house, working on a project, or planning the week’s meals. I wasn’t cooking or washing dishes because the beauty of Boy Scouts is that they cook and clean up. And I wasn’t caring for our four pets at home. 

     The moment of peace was blissful, and I thought. I don’t do this enough. The fact is, I should do it more. That rest is needed, and as I start my work week, I feel I need more sitting and reading or simply sitting. Not doing anything, and indeed not serving the moment’s rest with a spoon full of guilt.

     As I pondered this, I started wondering and reflecting. Have I been giving myself enough downtime? I know the answer. It is a resounding No. I don’t. I always meant to do that, but it never happens between writing, working, and helping my family. If I do manage to sit, I look around the house and start to think of everything that needs to be done. That guilt doesn’t allow rest and quickly becomes a thief, robbing you of every precious ounce of energy.

     I don’t let it be easy when it comes down to it. I let it be hard. I complicate, not simplify. I look at the mountain I need to climb and believe I can scale it. I might complain while doing it, And sitting still means I am lazy. Yes, those are the words I tell myself, and that is how I burn out.

     Several students requested to retake a quiz recently because they missed one question. They still made an A on the assessment, but it wasn’t perfect. While I admire this tenacity, I worry they will be afraid to try anything less than perfect. If I asked students who demand this of themselves, they would say it’s because of what their parents want and mostly what they believe they should have. Perfection. It’s the expectation, and anything less is not good enough.

     Perfection looks beautiful, but it’s always served with an ounce of regret and no rest. If you constantly strive for perfection, perfect doesn’t sit and watch the birds sing and the rain fall. Perfect doesn’t sit on the sidelines and enjoy the experience, but sometimes, that is what we need most.

     This week has reminded me that life is hard. People I know have suffered a tragic loss or are going through tremendous upheaval. Watching such loss is painful and jarring. Life is not easy, so why do we work so hard to make everything that could be easy even more complicated?

     We need to make life easy. We need to take a rest when we know we need it. Don’t drink more coffee and power through every time. Sometimes, you need to go to bed early and read. Sometimes, you need to slow down all that you are accomplishing and pause long enough to enjoy a moment and watch a sunset.

     The biggest key is to listen to what your body needs. Sometimes, you must work hard to prove you can climb the highest mountain. Sometimes, you need to sit. Think. Reflect and discover what you need most in life. Honor those feelings. Make a plan, and care for yourself, even if you are going through dark days. Those days often provide the steepest cliffs you will find, and before you can scale them, you need to conserve and store energy. You need to rest.

     And if you start to feel that resting means you're lazy, tell yourself Loreal’s famous tagline: “I’m worth it.”